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 Apr 01, 2009 - 10:49 AM - by Michael
* Life as a King

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Gamecube/Nintendo
So I've tried to play the "transformative" Wii title "Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life as a King" (and ain't it a mouthful just to say).

Let's just get this out of the way: this is one of the most boring, annoying, inane games I can think of. First play-through? That's all for unlocking the ability to do basic things, like tell people what to do. That's right, for the first 150+ days, you can't even get your adventuring parties organized properly.

Oh, but it gets better. Actually organizing things is about obliquely screwing around, rather than being direct. Want an adventuring party to all live next door to each other? No problem, just bulldoze their old houses without warning and build new ones for them. They'll happily move right in next to each other. Need a particular dungeon cleared? Set a board request for it and watch an entirely random group of adventurers report to try it, half of who aren't close to being level-capable, while your highest level adventurers all want to go clear out the newbie dungeons.

I mean, seriously. You don't even get to use all the options until a Game+ playthrough.

Do yourself a favor. Do NOT pick up this title if you value your sanity.
 

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